Goodbye Luke, Hello Franco

Ah, the return of Franco. I've been looking forward to it for weeks now, although it didn't seem to have quite the same build-up as it did the last time around. Maybe it was just because "Mad World" didn't play on a continuous loop for weeks leading up to today. We actually saw a lot more of Franco on his first day back than I thought we would. In fact, he opened the show, in his now-standard homeless guy disguise. Since Franco is a man of only a few disguises, it might be wise at this point for the Port Charles PD to issue a statement to the town's residents: "If you see a hot, young homeless guy, he's most likely this world-famous artist/serial killer we've been searching for."

It's Bensonhurst Vs. Bensonhurst as Olivia and Connie Throw Down

It's been an extra busy week at work, and I missed yesterday's episode of General Hospital. So while I had read about Patrick and Lisa kissing a couple weeks ago, I missed everything yesterday that lead up to it actually happening. I wasn't happy at all about this development. While I'll be the first to admit that I'm simply not a Robin fan (never have been), there are aspects of Robin and Patrick's relationship that I appreciate. I think it's a very real-to-life relationship, relatively speaking, as far as soap couples go (not like some where, say, each party is on their 11th marriage), so it makes it even harder to see one cheat on the other. Also, I never really saw the character of Lisa as anything more than a ploy to cause conflict in Robin and Patrick's marriage after they resolved Robin's postpartum depression and the couple was seemingly beginning to live happily ever after. I never felt any kind of real chemistry between Patrick and Lisa; it all just seemed forced upon us by the writers.

Recap of Last Night's Daytime Emmys: Old Guys, Orange Skin and A Few Awards Thrown In

I wasn't planning to do a recap of last night's Daytime Emmy Awards, but after sitting through the two-hour show, well, I have some thoughts I'd like to share. Since this post wasn't pre-medidated, I didn't take any notes while watching the show, and I apologize for not having any screen shots, but here are some random observations:

• At least half of the fun of awards shows is the red carpet, yet instead of CBS airing this one, I instead had to watch Tony Hawk pretend to be a cashier. Of course, I give credit to Soap Opera Network for attempting to stream the red carpet online, but for anyone who tried to actually watch it, it was fraught with technical difficulties--to the point where I found it unwatchable. I don't know what most of the stars looked like last night and sadly the few that I do know what they looked like includes Ron Moss and that funky scarf.
• Did they call David Copperfield up five minutes before the show started to see if he could kick things off? What was with the casual, untucked look? I'm sorry to break it to you Daytime Emmys, but I've read the book, and I'm pretty sure that means he's just not that into you. Way to start the show.
• I thought it was cool that David Letterman appeared to do a Top 10 on the show ... but why a Top 10 about Regis? Why not about the soaps? Like," Top 10 Reasons You Know Your Soap Character's Not Really Dead. No. 10: You blow up in car." I realize Regis is a part of daytime too, but he was already getting plenty of exposure as host.
• I wasn't exactly paying the closest of attention (thank you, Twitter, for the distraction) but I'm pretty sure an odd parade of older men started to come out at this point. I do remember Don Rickles appearing at one point and thinking, "What in the world does he have to do with daytime?" I'm sure they explained it, but I was too bored to care.
• It's near impossible to say anything bad about Dick Clark, and I was completely choked up when he started crying at the end of the American Bandstand Tribute ... but did we really need that long of an American Bandstand Tribute? Especially when other tributes, namely the one to As The World Turns, were so stinkin' short?
• One highlight of the Bandstand tribute was when all the stars started doing the twist at their seats along with Chubby Checker up on stage--I may or may not have twisted just a little in my living room. But what in the world was Chubby wearing? Maroon pants and a red blouse (yes, I said blouse) with some odd gray jacket over the whole mess? Much like everyone knows not to wear white after Labor Day, can we please make a similar fashion rule about wearing maroon and red together? Please. I implore you. Do it for Chubby.
• Yeah, they were in Vegas. I got it. Did not need the Lion King performance, or the human crab walking over to hand Wayne Brady an envelope to reinforce that concept. If you want to give me Vegas, give me a slot machine and a martini. Otherwise, don't bother.
• Speaking of Vegas, are there no good tanning salons there? Why was everyone orange? Like, really orange?
• As I tweeted last night, The Blue Man Group ranks just beneath clowns and The Burger King on my list of things that seriously freak me the flip out. I have a restraining order out against any man in blue makeup, and they broke it by appearing on my TV set last night.
• Maybe if they cut down on the aforementioned Bandstand tribute, Lion King performance, Blue Man Group appearance, etc., they would have had more time for the actual awards. I was sorely disappointed that they skipped the clip reels while presenting the acting awards and that the show reels for Best Drama Series weren't longer. Not only is this a time to spotlight the nominees, but very few people watch every single soap, and the reels give the audience a taste of their favorites' competition.
• What happened to Cheech and Chong? Did I spend the whole night wondering what the heck could Cheech and Chong possibly be doing there (as promised in the opening credits) and somehow miss them on the show?

As for who won the actual awards, I only watch General Hospital these days, so I can't really say who was deserving and who might have gotten robbed. I know I was thrilled when Julie Berman and GH's directing team won, and flat-out miserable whenever GH or one of its actors lost.

So what am I forgetting, folks? Because I'm sure I'm forgetting something. What were your overall thoughts on the show? I saw a stat today on Twitter that the ratings for last night were up more than 80 percent over last year's broadcast on The CW, which is great to hear for daytime. But I watched more out of obligation than enjoyment, and frankly, daytime fans--and stars--deserve better.

How Do You Solve a Problem Like Kristina?

Friday's episode started off right where Thursday's left off--with Sam in a tub full of bubbles trying to coax her man into some hanky panky telephone-style, even suggesting that she'd like to see him "all oiled up." But when she got to the part about her and Jason taking a Mediterranean cruise, I started to imagine Stone Cold in the buffet line or on the shuffle board court, and that kept me way more entertained than the couple's phone call. I did think it was sweet, though, when Sam said, "You can't stop me from my big dreams," and Jason replied, "I would never try." Ahhh. Under that extremely chiseled exterior, he really is just a big softie.

He just moved in, but something tells me that Johnny Z. is going to have to replace the carpeting in his penthouse doorway very soon given the amount of visitors that come in and out in a single episode. First through the door today was Kristina. After telling Jason just yesterday that the "Johnny Kristina Port Charles" revenge plot against Sonny "works for me," the Mob Prince suddenly changed his tune, telling Kristina that their pretend relationship has to end. In the meantime, Sonny gathered together Max and Milo to order a hit on Johnny. Hmm, I'm sure that brilliant plan will go off without a hitch. And good thing Sonny's flying so far under the radar on this one that no one would ever suspect that he would want Johnny dead.

While Johnny tried to figure out how you solve a problem like Kristina, there was an impromptu Bensonhurst reunion on the docks as Brook Lynn ran into Olivia gazing up at Johnny's penthouse. Olivia proceeded to give Brook a crash course in Zacchara history, and when she mentioned Johnny's past attempt to go legit, I had a flashback to that one winter where the poor guy was selling Christmas trees in an attempt to distance himself from his insane mob family. Legit Johnny was bittersweet ... he was adorable for trying, but you knew it would never last. Back to JOlivia, this couple never fails to strike an emotional cord with me. I'll admit to getting a little misty when Olivia told Brook Lynn, "That man is directly responsible for some of the happiest moments of my life." Aww. Of course, I think wine and handcuffs played a major role in a lot of those moments, but I don't judge.

Quite honestly, I actually thought something happened to my recording of this episode, and that it cut out part of the episode. Because one minute, Olivia was wistfully telling Brook that her and Johnny are over. And then the next minute, she's running into Johnny's place to make another happy moment. Huh? But oh, what the hell, I'd throw logic out the window too if this was waiting for me on the other side of that penthouse door:

Only one problem: Johnny was so caught off guard by Olivia's unexpected visit that he forgot to tie the sock around the doorknob to alert all potential visitors that he was getting busy inside ... and Kristina walks in on the couple right in the middle of some couch lovin' and Olivia telling Johnny that she was doing what no 17-year-old could possibly do. Amen to that, sister. BTW, does being a pretend girlfriend give you the privilege not to knock? Sheesh.

Elsewhere in The Chuckles: Kristina wasn't the only Corinthos kid to walk in on some spontaneous nookie today, as poor Michael interrupted Lante getting ready to make sweet love in the middle of his new home. Later, Michael shared some bonding time with new neighbor Brook Lynn, who offered ... what else? ... to cook for him sometime. And Carly and Jax shared a tender moment over a mutual agreement that Sonny should be out of their lives. And all I kept thinking was, "Hee hee, just wait til Brender shows back up in August and throws you two for one major-ass loop!"

Phone Sex Fails to Heat Up Stone Cold

So I just watched Thursday's episode of General Hospital tonight. Since I'm a day behind, my original plan was to do one post on both yesterday's and today's episodes ... but well, there's simply way to much going on in The Chuckles to just gloss over things like phone sex attempts and Mercedes contemplating a leave of absence as caretaker for all of Port Charles' children under 12. BTW, with all the children she's cared for, how has Mercedes never factored into a "cheating with the nanny" storyline? That seems like prime soap opera material, after all. At the very least, in a town where the single men obviously outnumber the single women, Mercedes could be well utilized as a potential love interest for, say, a Matt Hunter, or Milo, or even that Conan guy who waiters at Sonny's pretend restaurant.

Speaking of men outnumbering the women, how in the world did boring ol' Maya command the attention of all three Spencer men at one time? As I've said before, I really want to like her, but GH is doing everything it can to make sure that never happens. I did laugh though when Ethan asked her out for drinks and she replied, "We'll see how my day goes." Translation: "I'm not going anywhere in public with a man with that hideous half bun on the back of his head." Oh honey, you should have been here earlier when the eggs were served.

Back in Pentonville, Jason takes a break from all his many visitors--no, not to bang out license plates, but to make a personal phone call. Ah, the life of a prisoner. A very bubbly Sam (see what I did there?) answers the phone and, while perhaps well-intentioned, attempts to have phone sex with the most non-talkative, unemotional man on the planet. Save it for the conjugal visit room, Sam. God love him, but your man's a do-er, not a talker.

Luckily for Jason and Sam, GH has decided to twist the law into a pretzel once again and give Jason a free pass out of Pentonville. In order to lure out Franco, who's mailing out so many pics of dead bodies he's running out of postage stamps, Jason will be released from the big house and placed in the custody of ... who else? ... Dante Falconeri, patron saint of criminals and otherwise wayward souls. There's one catch, though: If Jason runs while on this special prison furlough, it's Dante who gets shipped to Pentonville to hang out in the visitation room all day and occasionally make dirty phone calls. Now, if I were Jason, and seeing as how he kinda sorta hates Dante for being a traitor to the organization and getting Michael sent to prison, I might just grab Sam out of the bubble bath and head for The Island, just to see the Falc-ster get thrown behind bars. But I have a sneaking suspicion Franco will take precedence over any Dante revenge schemes.

Speaking of Franco, he returns to Port Chuck in just a few days. Are you guys excited to have him back?

General Hospital Violence Continues: Ethan Murders Plate of Eggs

As a woman with a forum to publicly express her views on the Internet by way of this blog, I find it necessary to interrupt our regularly scheduled programming from time to time to issue a public service, if I feel the message is of the utmost importance and will have an overwhelmingly positive impact on society as a whole. Today, my friends, is one of those rare times. Man or woman, I vehemently urge you to heed the advice I am about to impart. In the simplest of terms: Never, ever, under even the most extreme of circumstances, style your hair like this:

Now that that business has been taken care of, we can move on to all the many things that I love about the Spencer men. As I mentioned yesterday, I'm a huge fan of Jonathan Jackson's Lucky, and I've particularly enjoyed his interactions with Tony Geary since he's returned to the role. I'm happy, too, that Lucky and Luke are now in a place where their relationship is about more than just animosity and disapproval. I'm looking forward to seeing how this whole "Odd Couple" scenario plays out with Luke crashing at Lucky's apartment. I, for one, was amused from the moment Luke woke up drunk on Lucky's couch.

I didn't want to be too hard on Ethan after calling him out on the whole hair thing, but it's impossible to talk about today's episode without mentioning, well, The Eggs. I mean, home boy went Rambo on that plate of eggs. The man steals for a living. If he was that hungry, couldn't he have swiped a scone off of the Quartermaine credenza and ate it on the way over?

Elsewhere in the Chuckles, Doc Niles has decided that playing both sides of the fence is much more fun than playing just one. After Patrick tries to show up to work after yesterday's suspension, and Steve promptly escorts him back out, Lisa runs to Patrick to tell him that Steve is taking this whole fist to the face thing "a little too far" and she's totally on Patrick's side. Our perky orthopedist even goes so far as to promise Patrick that she'll talk to The Man She's Sleeping With on Patrick's behalf. Meanwhile, Lisa, don't you know that the first rule of Fight Club is that you don't talk about Fight Club? But once back at GH, Lisa snuggles up to Chief Stevie and tells him that Patrick crossed the line by hitting him and he deserves the suspension. Ooh, I didn't know she was that devious.

By the way, I know I'm splitting hairs when it comes to GH actually mirroring reality, but don't you think suspension would be the least of it if you punched your boss in the face in the middle of the workplace? And then called him an idiot? Even if your official title is Best Neurosurgeon in the World.

Port Charles' Not So Young and Restless Throw a Pity Party at Jake's

If there's one thing you should know about me, it's that I sure do love me some Coleman. The man just makes me smile. So whenever my favorite bartender and his dive bar, Jake's, get some screen time, I'm usually a happy girl. After all, Jake's is for all that's fun and carefree in the usual somber, macabre Port Charles--girls' nights out and tequila shooters, karaoke and non-wedding receptions, not to mention getting loaded and taking someone you have no business being with in the first place to the infamous "room upstairs." Just like the Docks are for overhearing other peoples' conversations and occasionally pushing someone into the water, Jake's is for letting your hair down and having a good time.

So who moved the old man pity party into our favorite watering hole today? Oh yes, that would Patrick, fresh off of punching Steve in the face and receiving a suspension from his position as Best Neurosurgeon in the World. He's soon joined by Luke, and the two try to reconcile their lives as former playboys who have now found themselves settled down as one-woman men.

After all that's been made about Patrick's wild bachelor days, that he would be struggling to adjust to the major changes in his life seems authentic to me. I'd even buy the ex-girlfriend jealousy thing ... but I just don't see any spark at all between Patrick and Lisa, even a "hey we use to do it a lot" spark. The whole Lisa thing seemed forced from day one just to cause some friction between Patrick and Robin. BTW, gotta love Lisa telling Patrick that, yes, her and Steve are "sleeping together" ... way to stay classy, Doc Niles. I might have gone with the more discreet "we're dating," or "we're enjoying each other's denim."

Anyway boys, next time you want to commiserate over how wild and fun you use to be, take it over to the Haunted Star. They need the patrons over there anyway. Leave Jake's for when you're in the mood for a round of sex on the beach shots and singing "Sweet Caroline" from the nearest table top.

Oh, and one other thing you should know about me: I adore Jonathan Jackson and "his" Lucky. So I've been particularly interested to see who he's going to be paired with next, romantically-speaking--Claire, Maxie, Maya, Alfred's daughter who has just moved to Windamere from Seattle (and that last one's just off the top of my head, GH writers; my resume is available upon request should you need further assistance). Personally, I've loved the few Lucky and Claire scenes we've had (Clucky!), although I like his chemistry with Maxie too. Today we got to see Lucky in the middle of a Claire-Maxie sandwich down at the precinct. So what do you think? Who does Lucky have the greatest chemistry with? Who do you want to see him coupled up with?


One last thing: Maxie's pink crutches. Fabulous.

Sam Resurrects the Ghost of Brenda for Some Lovin', Jailhouse-Style

(So after a long day at work, I finally sat down to watch today's episode of General Hospital ... and like Michael asking Dante for a cold beer, I was quickly denied. For some reason, my DVR chose to malfunction today. So a special thank you to GeneralHospital678's YouTube channel for helping me catch up. And my apologies for the screen shots not being as hi-def as usual.)

The steady stream of visitors continued into Pentonville today. I'd joke about how they should just move Jason's cot into the visitor's room since he's in there more than in his cell, but well, we'll get to his visit from Sam in a minute. First in line for a little one-on-one time with P-ville's most popular prisoner was Maxie. (BTW, her new haircut, which I wasn't a fan of at first, is starting to grow on me. I think Maxie, or Kristin Storms for that matter, can pull off anything). We quickly learned that Dante and Jason aren't the only ones to receive recent calling cards from our favorite psychopath, Franco. Maxie also received the same photo that Dante did of Random Dead Guy. And she wants Jason Morgan, our cute, cuddly "head case of a different sort," to put a stop to all this Franco nonsense once and for all.


Maxie gets my "line of the day" for proclaiming that Jason sending himself to prison to protect Michael was "the most selfish thing you've ever done," since it renders him nearly useless to protect her and the rest of Port Chuck from the infamous artist/nut case. Ahh, I can already hear Adam Lambert's "Mad World" playing in the background ... "mad world, mad wooorrrllldd ..."

Over at that same patch of grass that all Port Chuck residents visit when they decide to go to the park, Patrick is spending some quality father-daughter time with Emma (isn't she adorable, by the way?) when, uh oh, out from behind the bushes like a bear ready to steal your picnic basket ... it's the denim twins, Lisa and Steve. And they're toting ice cream cones and, yes, of course, they're wearing denim. In fact, I think Steve was wearing the same denim shirt that Lisa disrobed him of last week. Has this become Steve's "lucky" shirt? If this keeps up, we're soon going to see denim scrubs in the surgical wing. Lisa and Steve may procreate just so they can put their kid in those new denim diapers.

As most of you already know, Vanessa Marcil is resuming her role of Brenda Barrett in August, and we got the first mention of her on GH since the big announcement last week. Spinelli managed to resurrect Jason and Brenda's old marriage license so Sam could impersonate Brenda and use the paperwork to get a little jailhouse lovin'. OK, I'll admit it, I want a conjugal visit with Jason Morgan, because damn, that was hot, people.

Perhaps the only place getting more visitors than Pentonville is Johnny Z.'s mafia condo. Between P-ville and Jay-Z's place, the Metro Court would kill for even a fraction of that foot traffic. First up is Brook, who after witnessing a conversation between Olivia and Lulu about Johnny and Kristina, storms over to Jay-Z's to reprimand him for getting involved with young, impressionable K, and to warn him that if he continues, "it will blow up big time." Hmm, is that a premonition, Madame Ashton? Nah, really she's just trying to get into Jay-Z's pants. But, heck, can you blame her? (BTW, if you melted all of Dante's many gold chains together, I think you'd get something similar to what was hanging around Brook's neck today: )

Next up on Johnny's doorstep is Alexis, who he offers "wine, scotch, pig in a blanket?" Ah, your buddy in crime and comedy, Ethan, would be proud of you for that zinger, Jay-Z. But before Alexis can get very far with her "how dare you use an impressionable 17-year-old to seek your Sonny revenge" speech, Kristina herself shows up and stakes her claim on her pretend boyfriend. She wants to be with Johnny, and nothing's going to stop her.

So what are your thoughts on this Sonny revenge plot I've dubbed "Johnny Kristina Port Charles"? At first, I was really turned off to even the pretend idea of Johnny and Kristina together. And while I still don't think it's right that Johnny is even entertaining this in lieu of Kristina's age and recent trauma (not to mention what it's done to him and Olivia) it has made for some captivating television these last few days.

Dante Orchestrates Michael's Release, Must Wear Fewer Gold Chains as Part of Deal

Wow, I'm still wrapping my head around yesterday's episode. I have to say, I wasn't initially looking forward to seeing the "Johnny Kristina Port Charles" (and special thanks to my blog follower PartyAtJakes for getting that movie reference) storyline play out, but it already has made for some amazing television, especially the scenes involving Johnny and Olivia.


As I said earlier this week, JOlivia is one of the most authentic couples on the show--funny considering I thought they only started out as a gimmick ("hey, let's do the whole cougar/MILF thing!"). And I really felt for both of them on Friday. Johnny's singular motivation is to bring down Sonny and avenge his sister, even if it means, as Olivia pointed out, using a 17-year-old abuse victim. Johnny should have never even pretended to cross that line.

On the other hand, it was difficult to see this couple moving forward in light of Olivia's feelings for Sonny (remember Olivia and Sonny making out over a pot of chili in the kitchen at Kelly's?). Loved the scenes with Johnny pouring his heart out to new best bud, Ethan (by the way, has Ethan actually moved into his pretend apartment?! He's there more than Johnny). "Olivia and I don't love each the same way," the mob prince told Ethan and his ever-present pocket chain. "She has all of my heart ... and I only have the piece of hers that doesn't belong to Sonny." Sad, but true, Johnny Z. Sad, but true.


By the way, how could Kristina actually say to Ethan, "I hadn't really thought about it like that--that someone could die." Uh, it's Sonny Corinthos, my dear. Someone always dies. Isn't that why you threw Ethan under the bus in the first place? Because you thought Daddy would kill Keifer if he knew the truth? Did you really think he was going to decompress from his daughter sleeping with his arch enemy with a glass of warm chamomile and a long bath?

To add a little levity and humor to such a heavy, emotional episode, we cut to Jason and Claire Walsh discussing serial killer Franco. Normally, a conversation about a serial killer wouldn't be light and funny, but this is The Chuckles after all. "I'm not like Franco," the hit man proclaimed to Claire. "No, you're a headcase of a different sort," the prosecutor quipped back. Hee hee. She's got a point there, Jason Morgue-an.

I am always baffled by how General Hospital portrays our legal system, but the logic of this latest plot twist truly escapes me. I'm not a lawyer, so maybe this could conceivable happen in real life ... but I'm skeptical. So Judge Carroll has suddenly released Michael from his prison sentence based on a conversation he has with a cop who happens to be the prisoner's half-brother. No lawyers present, no nothing. Just good ol' Dante and Judge Carroll working out a deal:

"OK, OK, we'll give Michael the counseling and community service everyone's been begging for. But he must live with you, Dante, in your tiny studio apartment that doesn't seem to have a door bell. Or a lock. And he can't see Sonny! Oh, and one more thing ... "

"Anything, Judge Carroll. I'll do anything for my bruth-er."

"Cut the number of gold chains you wear per day down to four!"

Convoluted or not, it was good to see Michael out of a prison uniform and back home in Port Chuck. Even baby Josselyn showed up for the occasion:

Judge Carroll Grants Michael's Release, Dante Rushes Home to "Celebrate"

So I missed a few scenes of today's episode, but I think I got the gist of what's going on. Dante visited Judge Carroll to plead with him for Michael's release, and for whatever reason, it actually worked this time. Then Dante got so worked up over his success--or perhaps the vision of the Judge looking devastatingly handsome in a shirt and tie--that he immediately ran home to Lulu and started tearing off clothing. Nothing like celebrating an 18-year-old's imminent release from prison with a little afternoon lovin'. BTW, what's the benefits package like over there at Crimson? Lots of paid time off I'm assuming?

Back to Judge Carroll for a minute: I've generally enjoyed his character, but what's with the rationale of throwing Michael in prison to get him away from Sonny? Yeah, I get it, the influence of a mob boss father is not a good one, but is incarceration with harden, dangerous criminals really a wise alternative? Six of one, half dozen of another, Judge Smarty Pants.

The most ill-conceived ploy ever, "Johnny Kristina Port Charles," ramped up today smack in the middle of the Chuckles' newest and most popular thoroughfare--Baker Street (also where Carly takes her fake yoga class, where the MEthan coffee incident took place, and now, where Sonny witnessed his daughter being "felt up" by Jay-Z). Something about this whole thing really disturbs me. Everything Sonny's done aside, it seems more than a little sick to get back at him by making him think a grown man is getting busy with his 17-year-old daughter, who's just getting over being violently abused. Given Kristina's habit of lying, and Jay-Z's habit of doing just about anything to lash out at Sonny, why isn't anyone taking a closer look into this? And hasn't Sonny learned yet that jumping to conclusions that may be false, and threatening to murder someone regardless, might not be his ultimate pathway to success? If I was Morgan, I'd start taking karate lessons in Japan ... family be crazy!


I hope Johnny doesn't get snuffed out though for messin' with the mob boss's daughter, as I'm really enjoyed this whole Odd Couple thing him and Ethan have going on right now. (Side Note: Is it possible for Maya to bitch anymore than she already does? Don't waste your pretend apartment on that nag, Big E.)

Cut to Pentonville, and more Shawshank Redemption scenes today between Jason Morgan Freedman and Michael Tim Robbins. Was Jason writing in a journal at one point? Meanwhile, this Pentonville gets more visitors than a Sunday open house over in the "good" part of town. I did feel bad for Michael at the end, though, when he said that mob life was the only future he could have after his time in the slammer. You know Michael's portrayer Chad Duell is probably thinking, "Great, how did I get stuck with this? Every other soap teen gets a fun, summer at the pool club storyline ... "

You Had Me At "Let Me Clean Up Your Cleavage"

I guess GH wisely figured they didn't need to drag out the Denim Twins post-coitus, as Steve was already showered and back at the hospital treating patients by the top of today's episode. Wait, didn't we just leave you and your marvelous abs back on Doc Niles' couch? Apparently, a more pressing duty called in the name of Tracy Q. and her Greece-induced viral infection.

While I have to admit to fast-forwarding through most of Luke and Tracy's dungeon scenes last week, I do often enjoy these two and their banter quite a bit. (BTW, Luke stealing the flowers out of the neighboring hospital room to give to Tracy ... classic!) And I really do feel for Tracy when she has these moments where she just can't take Luke's antics anymore, because Jane Elliot plays it so well. "You made a fool of me and broke my heart," she told him today ... sniff sniff. But at this point, she's starting to sound like the Quartermaine who cried wolf ... she's given this speech to Luke before (usually right before he jets off to Amsterdam, err, parts unknown) but she always ends up taking him back.

Back at the Quartermaine mansion, Edward was mourning the anniversary of Justice's death while Maya sat and listened with the depth of a cardboard cutout. I tried to like her yesterday, I really did. But there's just nothing there, people. Even still, GH seems to be full steam ahead with the MEthan pairing. Um, from what I could see, Maya spilled coffee on her upper chest/cleavage area. And Ethan was going to help her "clean that up"? Back at his pretend apartment? Considering you get pissed at everything, Maya, how about the fact that this guy you supposedly loathe just offered to wipe down your boobs back at his place?

Is it just me or could Ethan and Johnny totally team up for a buddy comedy? I'm seeing the next Owen Wilson and Vince Vaughn here, complete with madcap mob hijinx: "It all sounds good ... except for that little 'we could die' thing." "Oh, just donate all this crap to charity then!" (roll laugh track)

The Only Thing Better Than One Denim Shirt ... Is Two Denim Shirts

It's hard to start off a recap of today's episode with anything other than Johnny and Olivia. I mean, holy shattered glass in the carpet! For a pairing that at first seemed nothing more than a gimmick ("ooh, this cougar thing seems to be taking off!"), I think they are one of the more interesting, dynamic and certainly the most passionate couple on the show right now--whether they're fighting or making up. Even though it always seems as if the odds are stacked against them, they always end up getting busy on the couch in the middle of a good bottle of wine and a plate of pasta. (And seems only right that they stay together since neither one of them have bedrooms in their apartments.) But hot sex and half-eaten chicken parm aside, their last scene together today was truly touching, and the main reason why we root for these two crazy kids to stick together. See, Lucky, you're not the only guy in Port Charles who's man enough to openly shed a tear or two.

Jolivia weren't the only ones steaming up the window panes in Port Chuck. The town's resident "denim twins," Steve and Lisa, also took it to the couch with a bottle of wine and dueling shirts that made me wonder if they started purposely coordinating clothes before they even officially became a couple. I have to say, I felt more awkward than anything watching these two. Which is a shame, because Steve is really hot. And I think I saw something ridiculous like an 8-pack when Lisa disrobed him of his denim. I'm actually surprised good guy Steve still hopped aboard SS Lisa knowing she really has the hots for Patrick and he's nothing more than a "Mr. Right Now." But I guess it's hard to say "no" when your buttons are being pulled at by a pretty blonde with a Nascar fetish. Denim Twin Powers ... Activate!




I actually started to like Maya Ward just a smidge today during her last scene with Ethan, before she got up and stormed out of the only casino known to man that's rarely open for business. Up until now, she has seemed mostly stiff and dull. And while I get that the whole "he likes her, she hates him" is a standard ploy for laying the groundwork of a potential couple, her sudden outburst at Ethan just seemed forced and judgemental. I dunno, am I missing something with her? With her and Ethan? Is this a MEthan in the making that's gonna take the Chuckles by storm?

Sonny Will Hate It More Than God Hates Sin

No, not a pair of khakis and a polo shirt. Of course, we're talking about Kristina's master plan to feign a little somethin' somethin' between herself and Port Chuck's hot mob prince, Johnny Zacchara--just the mere thought of which would send Sonny screaming right out of his silk suit. Johnny's not biting for now, but something tells me (and no, not just the spoilers I read) that we haven't heard the last of this convoluted scheme. I'm surprised Johnny didn't bring up Olivia as one of the many reasons for not playing Kristina's reindeer games. For a man so deeply in love, you would think not pissing off your hot-blooded girlfriend would be top on your list of priorities. Hey Johnny, I think someone once mentioned she's from Bensonhurst, and we hear the broads are pretty tough around there.

Speaking of Sonny, why so much screen time for him and Claire Walsh? Are we really going to go through the whole Sonny seduces the prosecutor storyline yet again? I really enjoyed Claire's scenes with Lucky a few weeks ago, and was hoping the show would continue to build on that obvious chemistry. Although I guess Claire can't exactly make cute with Lucky while he's busy wreaking havoc (and yes, I do mean that bad Irish accent) all across Greece. If Jonathan Jackson doesn't get an Emmy for managing to tear up in nearly every scene he performs, then there's no justice in this bloody world. And can someone please tell me what shade of lipstick he wears? I'm convinced it will go perfect with my skin coloring.


Yes, it was sorta cute that Emmy award winner Julie Berman's character Lulu told Dante that she was giving him an Emmy winning performance. But Emmy caliber or not, could the Lante show take a hiatus before I will Lulu and her towel to, oops, plummet right down the elevator shaft?

Enjoyed the banter between Carly and Patrick. If Kristina hadn't already delivered that "my dad will hate it more than God hates sin" gem, Carly would have walked off with the line of the day for claiming that Lisa's affections for Patrick were so obvious "she might as well be wearing a sandwich board." Not to mention how she then went on to accuse Patrick of picturing Lisa nekkid under said sandwich board.

The violent fighting--and ultimately murder--scene between Jason and Carter was disturbing to say the least on Friday, and Carter's deathbed (shower floor?) message from Franco gave me quite a chill. I haven't read anything about what happens to Jason as a result of Carter's death, so I'm watching and waiting along with the rest of you who refuse to be spoiled. But with the warden confronting Jason at the end of today's episode, something is about to go down. I don't understand, could the warden/prison guards actually have found the bloody clothes Jason masterfully hid underneath his cot? Why, that's the last place anyone would look!

Sunday, June 13, 2010: I'm Back, Baby

So I was on a pretty good roll back in 2008. I contributed a total of 50 posts to The Nurses' Station before deciding to give it up to focus on other writing projects. I was also a little discouraged, as I'm pretty sure I only had one follower in all that time I was posting (big shout out to PartyAtJakes!)

What I didn't give up on, though, was watching General Hospital, which I've been doing consistently since the 1980s. These days, I record each day's episode and watch it in the evening, or if it's a particularly busy work week, I'll hold a mini-marathon over the weekend to catch up.

I can't tell you how many times over the past year and a half or so I've watched an episode and thought, "I wish I could blog about that!" Afterall, a lot has happened since my last post back in September of 2008. It's actually funny to go back and read those old posts. It seems a lifetime ago that Carly was flirting with Karpov, Lulu was seeing visions of a dead Logan, and we were wondering if Laura had really woken up from her coma or whether she was just a hallucination.

Today, I was procrastinating on a project (as is typical of me) and dug up my old Blogger username and password ... and sure enough, they still work. I write for a living, and also write two other blogs, so I think I'm a little crazy for taking this back on. But there's little on TV that I enjoy talking about more than the folks of Port Chuckles, so here I go. Can't wait until tomorrow's episode!