Monday, 7/28/08: Good Lourdes Johnny!

I'm back into my normal GH routine after a bit of a crazy week last week. Thanks to my DVR, I did catch up on all of last week's episodes (as well as the first episode of Nightshift).

So you'd think I'd have tons to write about ... eh, not so much. Seems like the saaaammmeee things have been happening for days now. How did the Logan murder storyline that had me glued to my set initially take such a turn into Dullsville? Thank goodness Scotty Baldwin finally showed up to breathe some life into the Lulu and Johnny Hour. (BTW, does Kin Shriner just not age? Man looks as good as he ever did. Eat your heart out Rick Springfield.)

I've been trying not to harp on GH's blatant disregard for reality. But I just can't help bringing it up ... are Sal and Lourdes really going to leave Prof. Seigel's apartment vacant for months when they could be collecting rent on it ... in New York City of all places? But well, more importantly ... holy revelation! ... Sal and Lourdes' father was killed by the Zaccharas! So why isn't Lourdes turning in Johnny and Lulu ... revenge on her father's murders AND a $100,000 reward?! Don't tell me she's turning all that down because of some two-day old crush on Johnny. There must be something else to it.

Why is Matt Hunter so interested in Anna and Noah?

Is Ric Lansing so desperate for sex that he's willing to bargain with Claudia for it in exchange for getting Johnny acquitted? I've read Internet rumors that GH was going to pair these two up and maybe even do an arraigned marriage. Boy, do they know how to pick the boring ones. I still say Claudia is great with Nikolas (a pairing that hasn't been explored in weeks!) or, possibly even better, Jason!

Monday, 7/21/08: Dr. Hunter Proves the "Coupon Joke" Still a Great First-Date Ice Breaker

Poor Carly. I know she's done far more devious things, but I just couldn't help but feel sorry for her when bitchy ol' Kate set her up today. Wonder how Carly's going to retaliate ... although right now she seems far more concerned with trying to keep Jax from walking out the door.

We've been seeing a lot more of Nikolas and Nadine lately, especially with this counterfeit drug storyline ramping up. Nadine is nice and all, but after seeing Nikolas with Claudia (when are they going to reunite those two?!) it's obvious how much Nik and Nadine lack chemistry. YAWN. I actually enjoyed seeing Nadine and Dr. Hunter together much more ... what can I say, he won me over with the "I had a coupon" joke :)

Of course, the Lulu-Johnny insanity from Friday spilled over into today. I love how the PCPD is trying to figure out who "smuggled" the gun into the police station. I don't think you can really call it smuggling when someone just walks into the station with their hand shoved in their purse and no one even gives them a second look. At least the writers gave one character some sense ... Nikolas was able to figure out what the rest of the PCPD, including Lulu's brother, could not -- that Lulu was in on the escape and not a defenseless hostage.

So Johnny confessed his love to Lulu today. I'll tell ya, nothing more romantic than summer love, a young couple on the run ... I'd be very into these two if I could actually stand shrieky, grating, childish Loo Looo. But even though he doesn't look quite as good in a tight shirt, I'd take Maxie and Spinelli over these two any day.

How can Sonny really consider himself retired when he's providing "consulting" services to Comb-Over Karpov, the Russian Mobster? Seems like a slippery slope to me ...

Friday, 7/18/08: Reality Has No Place in Port Charles

I realize that soap operas and reality often don't mesh, and viewers have to suspend a bit of disbelief, but it's like the GH writers aren't even trying at this point. I almost have no words for how ridiculous Friday's episode was. Preposterous storyline and sloppy writing ... just when I thought the show was really delivering with the Logan murder plot. So Lulu's plan was to walk into the PCPD with a gun and what, threaten them to release Johnny? Because it's not like anyone else in the PCPD might have a gun too. It's best to threaten unarmed people with a gun, Lulu.

I complained in a previous post about how unrealistic Johnny's steady stream of visitors to the PCPD interrogation room was ... but now you mean to tell me the visitors aren't even frisked? Especially when you have known mobsters going in and out at will? There's a higher level of security to get into a baseball game than to see a prisoner at the local police station?? At it's not like Lulu's behavior wouldn't set off any red flags, given her hand was shoved in her purse the whole time. Uncle Mac should be forced to hand in his resignation immediately.

So Johnny, always the quick thinker, grabs the gun and again takes the fall for Lulu's stupidity by pretending to hold her hostage with it. I'm tempted to give him a pass because he looks really good in that size-too-small shirt he's been wearing for the past several days, but come on ... they couldn't have shoved the gun back into Lulu's purse? Because we know that's the last place anyone would think to look in the PCPD.

BTW, was it intentional to have Karpov the Russian mobster have such a horribly obvious toupee? Or is that the actor's horribly obvious toupee?

Tuesday, 6/24/08: Tick Tock Logan

Poor Logan ... while it was good to see him back in action today, he's like a dead man walking now. Is it too late for GH to change its mind and NOT kill him off?! I still can't get over how much he and Scotty look alike ...

I'm back to fast-forwarding through all of Robin and Patrick's scene. I tried to give them the benefit of the doubt for awhile, but I just can't take it anymore. I am so tired of listening to the same old argument over and over and over again. I'm so tired of annoying, bratty, self-righteous Robin shooting down all of Patrick's attempts to be involved in her and their baby's lives. She's quite the hypocrite. He should take her to court for joint custody.

If I absolutely have to deal with Lulu every single solitary day, I at least enjoy Maxie being thrown into the mix. She definitely makes the Loo Looo-Johnny debacle more bearable. And I covet all of her clothes, unlike Lulu's nasty tank tops and 80s rocker chick jeans.

Am I the only one who thought Sonny was going to jump into the tub with Kate in his tacky maroon suit?!

Friday, 6/20/08: Beware, Asian Virus Known to Cause Boredom

So Jason has succumbed to the Asian something-or-other virus, but so far is just suffering from a high fever and a bad attitude. No delirum or truth serum-type effects, as promised ... at least not yet. I still can't quite figure out why GH threw Jason, Claudia and Spinelli into quarantine together. I think it would be interesting if Jason had some feelings of affection for Claudia (romantic or otherwise) in spite of himself, but he seems to express only one emotion when they're together -- dislike. So where's the conflict? Why keep throwing these two characters together in life or death situations? I think I'm bored.

BTW, when Claudia flexes her insanely muscular arms, it's a little scary.

I had vowed to take a hiatus from talking about Lulu, but GH doesn't make it easy to avoid her by putting her on every blessed day. Friday we were treated to a Lulu and Johnny romp at the Quartermaine boathouse ... all wet and steamy and giggly until it dawned on Lulu that she had brought Johnny to the one place where she had seduced Dylan and lost her virginity. She confessed this sordid little detail of her past to Johnny -- including the resulting pregnancy -- but he seemed to get over it in record time. Probably because at that point, he just wanted to get some.