Thursday, 8/14/08: Alexis Is a Mess

Seriously, is there a bigger mess on this show than Alexis? Dating Jerry Jax should be enough to qualify her. Now, after all her frantic outbursts about needing Sonny to stay away from Christina ... she wants him to do "whatever he has to do" to protect her? So now it's okay if he makes the most of his mob tendencies in the name of their daughter? Hypocritical much?

Maxie is far from naive ... so how come she has no clue how Spinelli feels about her, or hasn't even considered the possibility? I know far-fetched is typical for GH, but still ... it's a cute relationship (one of my favorites on the show), but it certainly wouldn't suffer from a dose of realism.

Kate finally mentioned the "Olivia" again that she uttered in the hospital months ago after she was shot. It's her cousin. I mean, the woman is getting married in this big, splashy wedding ... no one has thought to question where her family is, if they're coming, who's walking her down the aisle??

Karpov must be reading this blog (or looking in the mirror) ... he's trying to tame the comb-over with a slicked-back look.

Wednesday, 8/13/08: You Know It's a Slow Day When the Gyno Pisses Me Off

So how incredibly unprofessional is Robin's gynocologist (is Kelly her name maybe?)?! Isn't there something called doctor-patient confidentiality? First she blabs to everyone at the nurses' station that Robin's having an ultrasound to determine the sex of her baby. Then she blabs again that Robin's having a girl. Maybe Robin and Patrick wanted to keep that info to themselves ... or tell people themselves. Regardless, what kind of doc does that .... as the new chief of staff (well, at least when he's on the nightshift!) Patrick should kick Loose Lips to the curb.

Random thought (cause let's face it, not much exciting happened on the show today): What's up with all the men in suits on GH? Sonny hangs around his house all day ... in a suit. Jerry Jax roams the park ... in a suit. Trevor nevers sees the inside of a court room ... yet he's always in that damn suit. I think all these guys need to loosen up a bit.

Thursday, 8/7/08: Karpov's Powers of Seduction

Aren't soap operas suppose to be about love and sex and FANTASY?! So when a powerful businessman is trying to seduce Carly with the promise of a warehouse full of diamonds and furs and sports cars, how do I get swept up in this fantasy when the man is as dog ugly and paunchy as Karpov?! (And no offense to the actor who plays Karpov, as I'm sure he's quite a lovely man in real life.) I mean, of course I don't expect the aging Russian mobster to look like Brad Pitt, but please people, give me something to work with here ... maybe like a Vincent D'Onofrio type from Law & Order: Criminal Intent. But seriously folks, not only is he hard on the eyes, but he's spouting off lines like "I lived in, what you say in America, zee projects" and "I like you more and more as time passes, even though I've only known you for 15 minutes" and "I WANT YOUR GRATITUDE AS A WOMAN"?! At least GH is consistent in making almost every male character on the show misogynistic. Pretty slick of Ms. Carly to nab his PDA though ... that is what you call in America zee pick-pock-et.

Speaking of turn-offs ... soooo don't want to hear about Kate's physical aching in Paris. BTW, Sonny is setting her up for one heck of a fall, isn't he?

What in the world was Jerry Jax babbling about? Snoozefest.

How awesome is Dead Logan? Is that a knife in your stomach or are you just happy to see me? I really felt his pain while he was banging on those piano keys.

Wednesday, 6/18/08: Alexis "Rides the Untamed Horse"

I remember an episode of Seinfeld where George realized that the more he abstained from sex, the more intelligent he became. And conversely, the more sex he had, the dumber he became. Apparently, Alexis has fallen prey to the same fate. One night after succumbing to the ... umm ... charms? ... of Jerry Jax, all GH's "role model" of a smart, successful, independent woman could do was shrug her shoulders and eek out, "but I have bad taste in men?" This is your portrayal of a strong woman General Hospital? Shame on you. At least those around her were quick to point out her hypocrisy, especially Nikolas. If my aunt slept with the man who poisoned me, I think I'd be a little pissed too.

It was especially hypocritical after her tirade yesterday against Carly and Sonny. Sonny is a detriment to your child, but Jerry Jax, who we're often reminded is a homicidal maniac, and the father of your other daughter, who just happens to be working for the Zaccharas, will keep everybody safe and warm?

Don't you really wish Carly would throw snooty ol' Kate right out of her hotel lobby?